Kai

Lying is disgusting and if I can avoid it, I will.
The definition I’m using of “can avoid” is if it’s a life or death situation, for example I may lie to talk someone out of committing suicide, or from doing something that would seriously harm them. I won’t lie just because society expects me to in order to blend in.

This is me making a declaration that I won't live a lie anymore. I'm a snow leopard, but I was raised as, and have all of the advantages of a human body, so I will use both to live a more honest, less burdened life. Society can choke on my fluffy phantom tail because I won't cater to it's pressures anymore. I'm an individual and once I'm gone you'll never see the likes of me again. So I'm going to live my life as openly me as possible and people can either embrace that, or turn their heads and pretend I'm not there. At least I'll know which people are worth being friends with.

 *Note: This post is based on my observations of common trends and personal experiences and may not apply to every therian.

A therian is someone who feels they are in part or in whole, spiritually or psychologically a nonhuman animal.

A therian is someone who feels there's something physically wrong with the body they're in, but can't always explain what it is or why.

A therian is someone who comes to the realization that they don't feel right in a human body.

A therian is someone who spends months, often years, telling themselves what they're feeling is crazy. They can't possibly be an animal with a human body.

A therian is someone who represses their nonhuman feelings, despite how much pain it causes them, because society tells them they can't possibly be real.

A therian is someone who finally finds others like them, and slowly releases the suffocating grip they've had on themselves, trying to hide who they really are.

This therian is using her past experiences to advocate for her kind. That we don't need to accept our lot in life. That it's too short to spend it hiding ourselves away, and that we shouldn't have to.

To sem-quote a wonderful movie. "The status is not quo. This world is a mess" and we need to educate it.

And sometimes simply standing up and being yourself is enough.

it's been a busy month. Around the beginning of it I got a email saying Guild Wars 2 was now up for preorder. I've been eagerly waiting for this game for over a year so I was geeked beyond words. Sadly we were out of spending money for the month, so my husband said I would have to wait. In that time I managed to get this one. :3

Like it? It's my dragon-sona and namesake, Felkes. I got the inspiration for her once during a cameo shift. I felt my phantom body very strongly so I quickly did a mental scan of myself so I could remember what I "looked" like and out came her. I've since come to the conclusion that while I may not be dragonkin, I believe I'm definitely dragon-hearted.

Anyways, I hope anyone who sees this likes that. Though I don't know or how many folks that will be since I don't really have any friends on this site....I'm really just writing to a wall here, but hey, it's better than tumblr. That site is a serious rage fest. :P

Well after I finished this picture, about a week after, my mate surprises me by saying he bought me the collector's edition of Guild Wars 2 as an early birthday present. This got us into the beta which was last weekend.

I could hardly sleep the night before I was so excited, at 3pm EST I was at my computer logging it, but I found out pretty quickly I had a problem. My laptop, Coco, wasn't powerful enough to handle the game. She was getting maybe 15 fps tops, and the lag was so bad I could barely move let alone fight.

My mate tried to help me fix it, but nothing we did made it better. I had spent the entire week optimizing my pc, defragging, cleaning, even deleting a lot of programs and files to make room, but it was all for naught. The game just wouldn't run well on my lappy. My mate spent that evening looking at bare bones kits on TigerDirect, trying to find me a new computer. He managed to find a nice desktop; 2 core 3.0 ghz processor, 4 gb ram, 500gb hard drive (twice Coco's size), and a separate graphics card. A Nvidia Geforce 220 with 1gb internal memory.

It's leagues better than poor Coco, who had a 250 gb hard drive, 2 core 2.1 processor, 3 gb ram, and an ATI Radeon 4100 graphics card, with no internal memory. During the beta weekend I had to share my husband's desktop, playing when he was asleep. I got enough time, I am on an almost totally opposite schedule from him after all, but his desk is messy and it wasn't the same as having my own computer.

But fourish days after we ordered it, it came. I now have my tower completely set up and have my own nice new desktop computer. The only thing I'm missing, and what makes it somewhat hard to use, is a monitor. Right now I'm using my tv, which is a 40" hd thing, but that's kind of rough. My vision is awful and I have to sit really rather close to it to see anything, and we had quite a bit of trouble getting it to show my desktop properly. It's working now, but it made my mate start looking into buying a new one, since this one gave us so much trouble. We don't really need it, but I'm a sucker for new tech and can't really say no if he can find us a nice one for a good price. ^^